Motherhood is the Nessicity of Invention

Bloody Cucumber
Bloody Cutting board
and Bloody baby finger.

Egon tried to help me cut up cucumbers for pickles today. He must have nicked an artery at the tip of that finger. But I caught him and a rag and slowed it enough to bandage and went back to pickle making (after a brief stink washing blood off of it all).

Soon enough he tore the bandage off when we weren't looking and managed to get blood everywhere.

Bloody floor
Bloody couch
Bloody baby

It looked like a murder scene in here. After I caught him and a rag again I stanched it enough that it wasn't bleeding so I didn't bother with a bandage.

Yeah- pickles, and dinner and  My husband and big boys disappear to scouts. So I play outside with the toddler. How many times does a baby have to be pushed on a swing? How many times can you pull a wagon around the yard? How many times do you walk in circles balancing the bike the toddler rides (and by ride I mean sit on the seat with his legs not touching the peddles)? I think he might be learning to steer. I open the garage so he can pull the wagon in more directions. And sit down to brush my old black dog. That always leaves a pile of fur that makes it easy to imagine his bones had melted away and that's all that's left of the poor pooch.

So now its bedtime and the someone roughly handles the toddler and his finger starts bleeding again. Nowhere near as bad. But he had to be caught and bandaged so that my bed is only made bloody by me. But he puts the bandage in his mouth and chews it off. So we add it back on with a layer or two of duck tape.

He still manages to get it off. So We get a big boy's sock and safety pin it to his shirt. So far 5 minutes and the bandage is still on.

But between the dog fur and the bloody little kid, one would think I had brutally murdered the dog and forgot the clean up after myself. Only the dog is happily staring at us through the glass door, wondering when we will give up and go to bed.